Alex Balk

When you're as clueless as I am it's helpful to be surrounded by those with their finger on the pulse.

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 13:31:58 -0500

Me: Do you know what Ed Hardy is?
Cho: yeah of course
Cho: christian audigier
Me: It is... a line of clothing?
Cho: are you kidding me?
Cho: it's definitely like a cultural thing
Cho: http://images.google.com/images?q=ed%20hardy&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&hl=en&tab=wi
Me: Dude, I shop at THE GAP. WHEN THERE IS A SALE. I don't follow fashion.
Cho: it doesnt matter
Cho: it's like part of the cultural zeitgeist
Me: I know, I see the name ALL THE TIME.
Cho: it's woven into the tapestry of our lives
Cho: did you read the thing on christian audigier in gq a few montsh back?
Cho: that should be a pretty good primer
Cho: it's pretty much a brand for dickheads in LA and europeans to wear
Me: ah
Cho: it's like tshirts with these designs on them for $150
Cho: that are also bedazzled
Cho: also
Me: Bedazzled? Really?
Cho: the guy who started the "clothing line" is the same guy who did von dutch
Cho: yeah
Cho: it's like got rhinestones and stuff on it
Me: Wow.
Me: People really are getting stupider.
Cho: von dutch = those really expensive mesh hats that everyone wore for like a year
Cho: it's a HUGE brand
Me: I'm getting that sense.
Cho: christian audigier is also best friends with jon gosselin
Cho: of jon and kate
Cho: plus eight
Me: Okay, this conversation is over.
Cho: i really cant believe you dont know what ed hardy is
Me: Dude, do I look like a DANDY to you?
Me: Some kind of trend-sucking fop?
Cho: i'm telling you
Cho: it's bigger than that
Cho: like i bet there have been nytimes pieces on ed hardy
Cho: i wouldnt be surprised if it was in PARADE
Cho: and yes
Cho: YOU DO SEEM LIKE SOMEONE WHO READS PARADE
Me: Only for Walter Scott's Personality Parade.
Me: I never miss that one.

Audio

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 12:29:38 -0500

Guess what topic this chart is used to illustrate. Go ahead,...

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 11:32:41 -0500

Guess what topic this chart is used to illustrate. Go ahead, guess.

And here it is: "Bite Me, Kanye! I Bum-Rushed the MTV Video Music Awards—Ten Years Ago This Week"

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 16:08:19 -0500

And here it is: "Bite Me, Kanye! I Bum-Rushed the MTV Video Music Awards—Ten Years Ago This Week"

How Decisions Are Made At The Awl

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 14:52:18 -0500

Choire: Is "bite me" nicer than "suck it" for a headline?
Me: "Bite me" is a little too genteel. It doesn't quite convey.
Choire: Yeah, but "suck it" is too over the top. It'll turn people off.
Me: How about "lick my left one"?
Choire: Yeah, I'll go with "bite me."

Apparently, I am five years old.

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 13:48:17 -0500

Because I have had “She’ll Be Comin’ Round The Mountain” STUCK IN MY HEAD FOR THREE HOURS NOW. What the fuck?

Mornin’!

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 09:12:50 -0500

Mornin’!

Name for my new emo band.

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 18:07:06 -0500

Inbox Confessional

"Glee," Sincerity, and the Maine Gay Marriage Repeal

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 17:00:18 -0500

"Glee," Sincerity, and the Maine Gay Marriage Repeal

"After the JC Penney column appeared, Wilson was accused by most of being mean. So what? Lots of people are mean. Karl Rove. Michael Kors. Perez Hilton. Most 8th graders."

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 16:58:06 -0500

"After the JC Penney column appeared, Wilson was accused by most of being mean. So what? Lots of people are mean. Karl Rove. Michael Kors. Perez Hilton. Most 8th graders."

V: The Review

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 16:35:26 -0500

“But we really should talk about the Big Show, the new head alien lady Anna, who is the BEST CASTING EVER because she is SUCH a Monet-with-a-twist in that she’s so pretty from far away but up close she’s not as cute and in fact totally scary. She rapes your face with her face and she does it while SMILING WITH HER EYES and it’s so confusing because she has the perfect pixie haircut of a passionate inner-city grade school teacher and is maybe wearing Armani Collezioni.”

You is my hot rabbit.

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 16:16:43 -0500

You is my hot rabbit.

Hell-o, hot hot Emily Gould cooking video!

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 14:04:11 -0500

Hell-o, hot hot Emily Gould cooking video!

I’m sorry, I will always be a sucker for these.

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 12:00:47 -0500

I’m sorry, I will always be a sucker for these.

Barack Obama's Top-Secret Message To Fox News

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 17:15:23 -0500

Barack Obama's Top-Secret Message To Fox News

Do I get to knock off the year of unemployment?

Mon, 02 Nov 2009 12:45:17 -0500

We were just wondering about how old someone we know is and I was like, “Well, he’s ten years older than me, so…” and it occurred to me that I was not exactly sure how old I am. I mean, I had the general vicinity, but I wasn’t entirely confident in the specific address. So I did the math.

It was not a good idea.

A+

Mon, 02 Nov 2009 12:17:54 -0500

A+

It was a tough call, but we came down for Yes on 2.

Mon, 02 Nov 2009 11:26:38 -0500

It was a tough call, but we came down for Yes on 2.

"Watching coins sort" is the new "watching paint dry."

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 16:31:27 -0400

"Watching coins sort" is the new "watching paint dry."

No photoshop here. This guy actually paints himself to be part...

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 16:40:41 -0400

No photoshop here. This guy actually paints himself to be part of the scenery.